Monday, July 9, 2012

Of Graveyards, Truths and Dares

So one of the Friday the Thirteeners (some awesome authors debuting in 2013), April Tucholke, asked me over to their blog to do a truth or dare. The post isn't due today; in fact, I have until next week.

The problem is, well, I picked a dare.

*why oh why didn't I pick the TRUTH??*

And the dare is to hang out in a cemetery at dusk and write a poem.

There are two major problems with this, as I see it.

1. I don't want to get arrested.
2. I don't want to get arrested.

Okay, maybe three.

3. I don't want the undead pissed off at me for sitting on their bones.

I mean, I Googled all these cemeteries in my town. And lo and behold, cemeteries are NOT like Ruby Tuesdays, because cemeteries close well before sunset. The websites also don't instruct you on what to do if a bony hand pushes its way out of the loamy soil, seeking flesh, its bony maw thirsting for blood and revenge and...

Oh. Did I also tell you I'm a total wimp when it comes to horror?

Anyway. Just wanted to let you know that this week probably, I may get eaten by midwest zombies on my journey to fulfill one, itty bitty truth or dare.

Any advice for me as I tackle a sea of undead, six-feet under? Do you think a police officer will buy my lame-o explanation that this is for writing research?

47 comments:

Rachna Chhabria said...

OMG Lydia, you should have picked the truth. Please don't expect me as your blog buddy to sit with you, else you will have to drag my unconscious body around ;)

Let me know how it goes.

Alesa Warcan said...

Cemeteries are actually quite peaceful when they're closed.

Like many experiences in life, there's nothing more within than what you bring with you.
-
If it comes to it, remember that you are a story a teller: you can lull both police and poltergeists with your deft tales and oyster-charm... : j

Shelly said...

take bug spray. I"d be more worried about the flying critters than the undead. You are brave!

Laura Pauling said...

Sounds like scary fun. I'd make my husband stand pretty close on the other side of the gate! Good luck!

Connie Keller said...

I can't wait to hear how it goes.

Most of the cemeteries in our area have fences and gates. I hope you don't have to climb a fence at midnight.

Sarah said...

At least they will be midwestern zombies, and therefore rather polite. And: you're a small person, by your own report, so perhaps the police will not spot you crouching amongst the graves, pen in hand? Good luck!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Where I live, there are tiny cemeteries everywhere, so hanging out near one at night wouldn't be a problem. Not that I'd want to do that either.

Em-Musing said...

If you can find a really old cemetery, it may not have a fence. Then just do it. Dusk isn't as scary as midnight, or 3 a.m., the witching hour. No zombies will get you, but there will be spirits. Just say a prayer if you get too scared. Bwah hahaha!

Louise Bates said...

We used to live right up the road from a cemetery, and it was the most social place in town. Seriously - that's where everyone went to walk, jog, chat, whatever. They did draw the line at picnics ...

Here's hoping you find a nice friendly cemetery for your jaunt!

Karen Lange said...

I think it just might be more fun than you think, and that you will come through with flying colors! Maybe you should make up some kind of "Press" badge in case the police do happen to see you. It would look more official then. :)

Old Kitty said...

Erm.... "Officer, it was like this when I got here, honest" always works! LOL!!

Awwww what a fun dare!! Good luck and enjoy you crazy gorgeous woman! Take care
x

Miranda Hardy said...

Sounds like fun to me. Lol

You can do it, Lydia. I have faith in you.

Barbara Watson said...

Cemeteries are peaceful places--at least during the day. Dusk isn't as creepy as night, however. Think of it as the hour after sunset. That's a nice image.

Dianne K. Salerni said...

Ah ... that would be no problem here. I can think of three old cemeteries in my vicinity -- all adjacent to Quaker Meeting Houses -- where you could go, no problem.

One of them is the home of the famous Ticking Tomb of Landenberg. (Famous in Landenberg, that is.) That's where I'd go!

And of course, there's the abandoned cemetery where I found the caged graves, but that's 2 hours from my house. I'd love to hang out there at dusk!

But I'm weird.

Stina Lindenblatt said...

Have fun with your dare, Lydia. I'd be so freaked out from being in the cemetery, I doubt I would be able to write a sentence, let alone an entire poem.

February Grace said...

The living scare me much more than the dead.

Maybe you should have the person who dared you write a note of explanation, complete with their cell phone number, for the police to call should there be any question...will she promise to post your bail?*

The poetry part you will have no problem with as we all know, you totally rock poetry...

Good luck!

xoxo
bru

(*note to self, never, ever play Truth or Dare. Period.)

L.C. Frost said...

The good news is, poems technically can be only one line! :-) Can't wait to hear how it goes.

LD Masterson said...

Wish you lived here. Our church has a small cemetary that would be perfect. As for disturbing the residents, stay on the pathway if you fear offending anyone, and look for a stone that's been there a long time. Whoever's under it probably doesn't get many visitors anymore and would welcome a chat.

Stephen Tremp said...

I stay away from cemetaries. Not sure who I'd be more afraid of, the undead walking around or the weirdos who like hanging around cemetaries at night. be scared. Be very very scared.

nutschell said...

ooh what a perfectly thrilling dare! I'm looking forward to seeing your post on it. :)

PS, I did ask Alex to do a Wed. Writers workspace post, so he'll be back sometime this year on my blog :D
Love to do a Spotlight Week on your book as well when it comes out.

Nutschell
www.thewritingnut.com

Emily R. King said...

Cemeteries don't scare me, but horror films do. I'm a total baby.

Maurice Mitchell said...

Lydia, you definitely got the short straw on that dare. Did they define how long the poem is and what counts as the cemetery? Maybe you can sit in the parking lot and write a Haiku.

Magan said...

Atleast Midwest zombies are probably well fed so they shouldn't be too hungry.

Linda Gray said...

Oh, dear. But YES, I do have advice for you: take a copy of a letter from your agent/editor/publisher with you--the one that says when your book is coming out and glows with pride on your behalf. The cops (and the un-dead) will be so impressed they will just want to make you happy.

Krispy said...

Well, do you have to be INSIDE the cemetery or just near it? If you're just briefly loitering outside the gates after closing, then you wouldn't have to break any breaking/entering laws! Also, I think dusk is much too early for the undead, but you never know. Just be prepared to run. WEAR APPROPRIATE SHOES.

Also, to avoid pissing off spirits, try not to step on their resting places, and you could send out a quick "Hey I'm just here to write a poem" mental message to any lingering spirits before you start your dare. Take heart; I slept in a room full of ancient dead babies in pots and I'm still around to tell the tale! YOU'LL BE FINE. :)

Jennifer Hillier said...

Girl, you are BRAVE! I don't like cemeteries. I don't like the idea all of those decomposing bodies buried beneath a mere few feet of soil. I wish you all kinds of luck, and watch out for those hands shooting up from the ground...

Clarissa Draper said...

Freaky dare. However, nothing will happen except what your mind believes will happen and who knows, maybe you'll created the best poem ever!

Deb Salisbury said...

ROFL! Could you call the cemetery owner and get a waiver? In writing, of course, so you don't get arrested.

I love cemeteries. I find them peaceful, not scary. No zombie worries for me - but then, I rarely read zombie fiction. :-)

Kristen Wixted said...

I read this earlier today and laughed really hard.
Do we get to read the poem?

Carolyn Abiad said...

IDK. Pick one of the cemetaries with flat markers, that way the zombies can't hide behind a gravestone and catch you by surprise?

Carol Kilgore said...

Perhaps a church cemetery. Or a pioneer one. Wear a head lamp. Just so you can see the page, understand. Not that you would need light to see the hand emerging. Or what the noise over to the left is.

vbtremper said...

What a cool poem will result! But I would also totally worry about getting arrested. I would try not to think about the undead and I'm sure there are ways to appease them and make them understand you are only there for a good reason. Um. Good luck with that dare!

Vicki

Elana Johnson said...

Uh, is it too late to switch to truth? Because I would be doing that. Uh, good luck!!

Leslie S. Rose said...

Back in my teen days - before my gray matter was fully developed - my friends and I used to play cemetery tag. It was actually closer to walk into the cemetery and run out scared out of your socks tag. There was no lingering.

Tricia J. O'Brien said...

I love old cemeteries. I think I'd like this dare if there was cemetery without gates or patrols.
They have to do it because of vandals, I'm sure. Maybe there's a church with a small cemetery that might let you hang out. :)

Carrie Butler said...

Eeek! Can you write the poem across from a cemetery? Say, at a nice, safe coffee shop? :)

Jennifer Shirk said...

Uh...I'm a chicken. Plus, I don't think I'd do well in jail.
Or it's going to be one SHORT poem. LOL

Elsie Chapman said...

I can't wait, Lydia :)

Liza said...

One of our town cemeteries is located in one of the prettiest spots in town, overlooking the harbor. I'd walk it at dusk with no hesitation. Think of it as a place of peace and a place of history...and then write very fast!

The Golden Eagle said...

I'd be worried about getting arrested, too. Hope no police are on patrol by the cemetery while you're there--and that you aren't eaten by the undead, of course!

Ciara said...

I was trying to get a perfect image for a photography class once, and I put a sheet over me and jumped up and down on an above-ground tomb. I got the shot, but I think I was much more daring as a teenager. It would totally creep me out now. At least you don't have to jump up and down on a tomb. Take a walk and sit by a nice tree. It will actually be peaceful. As for getting arrested, I'd find an old cemetery that is off a major road, no gates. The are usually not monitored. I only know this because of above mentioned project. ;)

Cynthia Chapman Willis said...

Yup, I'd be more worried about the graveyard residents (dead, undead, or anywhere in between) than the police. Can you linger on the edge of the cemetery? Does that count?

LTM said...

LOL! Ahh, Lydia, you funny thing! Just keep your ears open. The dead always knock three times before bursting out of their graves... :D j/k

But do bring a shotgun in case any zombies are hanging around. And don't think of that scene in Interview w/the Vampire where all the headstones looked at him...

I can't wait to read your poem! I bet it's going to be awesome! :o)

Coleen Patrick said...

That sounds scary to me. Maybe if you listen to happy, upbeat music in your ear buds? I think it scares away zombies too.

Jay Noel said...

I nearly got arrested at a graveyard. Don't do it!!!!

But then again, I was in high school, which pretty much made me look guilty in the police's eyes.

Theresa Milstein said...

I bet you could ask for permission. Sounds creepy. I'd bring a friend. And some sort of weapon. Or two.

April Tucholke said...

I regret nothing.

 
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